Acupuncture is a type of alternative medicine that treats patients by insertion and manipulation of solid, generally thin needles in the body. People do this for many different reasons, most of them including Pain Management and Depression, it's a fascinating thing i've always wanted to try,and so when I found out my friend Jenn now works for an Acupuncture Project that just opened up in my town, I knew I had to try it, and while at lunch with her the other day she happened to give me a coupon that would make my first session only FIVE dollars. I had no choice but to go and give it a try, I mean what else did I have to lose besides feeling in my face?
So I went online and booked the appointment and today I went in the morning with my friend Janel to go get poked.The location is small and a little grim, but that's mostly because I very vividly remember that this place used to be a methodone clinic. As I entered the front door I did a hail mary and prayed that they had bought new sets of needles.
The inside of the building is in stark constrast to the outside. There is the standard New Agey Relaxing Music, Earth Tone Paintings and a Hippy Lady at the front desk who greeted me in a soft whisper of a voice:
Lady: Welcome to Pinwheel! You Must Be Brandon!
Yeah the name of the project is called Pinwheel. Hilarious! And half of the reason I decided to go. She gave me a questionnaire that had me answer a few questions about why I was there and such. Now most of you probably think I went to go get Smoking Cessation or Weight Management, but fuck you, I didn't. I went for Mood, Energy and Motivation. I figured with all the changes I am making in my life, I have noticed a real effect on my energy and mood. When you don't rely on smoking and coffee for your energy and only the nutrients you feed your body throughout the day, you tend to get tired easily. My energy has been platteauing at around 2pm and just really drags me down. I wanted to maybe have it work on my Mood to help maintain a positive attitude throughout this process as well as to work on perhaps my biggest issue which is Motivation and Focus. It's the reason i've let myself get to the point I am now at. The smoking, the eating and the exercise I wanted to do simply on my own, for me. But for the other stuff I turned to acupuncture.
After, I filled out my questionnaire, I was taken into a main room that had MANY Lazy Boy Recliners covered in sheets and several people with many needles sticking out of MANY places fast asleep. I was nervous. I am not really a GROUP person. I hate GROUP therapy, GROUP dates...the only thing I like in groups is Sex, so unless we were about to get naked and get down, I was a little unsure. As I settled down and sat in the comfy recliner, I was asked to take off my shoes and roll my pants up. Oh! So it WAS sexytime? Hell Yeah. I learned a few seconds later that it was not, as my Acupuncturist (Is that a Word?) Michelle came up and greeted me in the same whisper, that was the thing about this place, everything was done in a whisper. I was afraid she would hear my need for motivation as "chronic burning urination" and never be the same again. However, it was quite the contrary, Michele was VERY nice and attentive and before long, I was stuck full of pins and told to sit there for 45 minutes:
The waiting was the hardest part. Michelle informed me that most people just kind of fall asleep in a very relaxing nap. That was not going to happen for me. I am SITTING in a goddamn recliner with pins in my HEAD, my EARS, my ARMS and my LEGS. I didn't want to frickin' MOVE, let alone drift off to sleep because as my boyfriend can attest I am quite the active mover and shaker when I sleep.
At this point, I felt bad for asking my friend Janel to come with me, because I thought we would be like a little more alone and that I could maybe talk with Janel to get over the nervousness, but I like I said we were in an open room with other people who seemed completely ignorant to the fact that they were strung up like pincushions. I just kind of wanted to LAUGH about the whole thing because it's very odd to look at yourself with all these needles just hanging out in your skin. I should have told her about my blood transfusion in the 80's..but we were past that point.
The pain of the needles actually didn't really hurt at all, and I guess I will liken the pain to getting a shot that hurts exponentially less than the needle of a shot feels. Most of the needles I couldn't even feel, though the ones in my ears and legs, I definitely felt. I tried to have Janel take a picture of me all poked and prodded but we both felt that in the current situation it would have been a little innappropriate, because like I said, most people are there for pain management, not for getting off their asses and cleaning the kitchen on a regular basis like me.
I tried to zone out and listen to the music and it WAS relaxing but I did have ONE complaint about it. I am pretty sure it had some kind of baby whale sound effect to it. Every 10 or 15 seconds or so in the music there was this weird subtle like...whining baby whale noise...it was NOT relaxing at all.
I really tried my best to relax and close my eyes and just be in the moment, and I think that for the most part I did, but my fear of death via needles kept me awake. I waited until the earliest possible moment I could officially be done and waved Michelle over who promptly took the pins out of me and thanked me for my first visit. She then handed me a card that told me of my "Plan" she reccommended. She reccommended that I try and go twice a week and that after 8 sessions we would do somewhat of a progress report, see if it was working for me and see where we needed to fix things. And just like that, I paid my five dollars and I was DONE.
During the process I did have a few involuntary "ticks" in the spots where I had needles and I did feel like there WAS an... "energy" kind of pulsing in my body and afterwards I had a kind of rush similar to when one gets a tattoo. They say that after your first session you are supposed to feel 5 to 10 percent better and I have to admit I DID. I wasn't bursting with intense supernatural strength and vigor, but I noticed there WAS a little more of a bounce in my stance. I was singing along to the radio a little more, had a little bit more SWAGGER if you will. Ain't nothing but a G Thang, Baby.
So I guess... I will be going back and the best part about this place is that payment is on a sliding scale. They realize that this kind of thing can be a little pricey and their goal is to help people of ALL walks of life to get this kind of therapy. You pay from $15 to $35. That's it! Whatever you can afford and no questions asked! And I think THAT's pretty cool. In a world where a trip in an ambulence costs you $1000 and where Health Insurance is BASICALLY unnaffordable unless you are already rich, this seems like a very nice and interesting alternative treatment for things that can get REALLY expensive like pain medications.
My Final Prognosis: If You Can Get Through the needle stigma, I say what do you have to lose?
If You Happen to be from Chico, CA like me, I am going to include a link to the website as well as their Facebook page, get a little info and maybe make an appointment!
Pinwheel Chico
The Pinwheel Community Acupuncture Project on Facebook
Peace.Love.Dorothy
I'm so happy you liked it! Acupuncturist is the proper term and we are a community based acupuncture project that is part of POCA (Peoples Organization of Community Acupuncture) There is a clinic in most areas, so google it and start feeling better friends!
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